The Insight Inspired by Henry and the Chipping Cheddar Witch

Lately, my son's favorite DVD to watch is Angelina Ballerina - a young, British mouse wrapped up in her ideals of being a prima ballerina. I pretty much have all 4 stories on the borrowed DVD memorized. One of the stories is a Halloween story centered around an old, local tale about the Chipping Cheddar witch - Chipping Cheddar being the village Angelina and her family live in. Briefly, the tale states that the Chipping Cheddar witch shows up and turns the mice into stinky cheese. Angelina's father is telling the tale to Angelina, her friend Alice, and her cousin, Henry. Henry attaches to the story, later becoming convinced that he sees the witch when, in actual fact, it's Angelina's ballet teacher, Miss Lily, dressed up as a witch for Halloween. Henry becomes very worked up, enlisting the help of their friend William to track down the Chipping Cheddar witch and stop her from turning the village inhabitants to stinky cheese. William becomes convinced when at one point, they go to the village shop and when they don't see the shop keeper but instead see a big chunk of cheese on the counter, they assume the witch has done her nasty deed there, turning the shop keeper into stinky cheese. Of course, at the end of the episode, Henry and William realize that all the while, it's been Miss Lily dressed up as a witch and that the story is just that - a story.

A couple mornings ago, as I was getting ready for work, I listened to this particular episode play out in the living room and it got me to thinking. The Chipping Cheddar witch episode is very reflective of what we all do on a regular basis - make up stories in our heads and then create evidence all around us to prove our stories to be true. We are so much like Henry who, being so taken away by the story, walks out of Angelina's house, sees Miss Lily's witch hat sticking up above the fence posts and assumes that this must be none other than the Chipping Cheddar witch! From there, just like us, Henry fabricates all the more drama, visiting the village shop, seeing a chunk of cheese and no shopkeeper and building on the story all the more. Meanwhile, the shopkeeper was in the back, only to come out after Henry's departure and wonder what the noise had been all about.

I can think of so very many examples of how I've done this in my own life, and I'm sure you can relate too. Here's one: while I have only ever wanted a committed and loving primary relationship, based on some life experiences, I made up a story in my head that men only ever wanted to use me and that "all the good men are taken". What ensued was a barrage of non-committal men in my life who always left me waiting and wanting for more, when they'd never intended to pursue anything permanent with me to begin with! Because I'd established this story in my head, my being proceeded to find evidence of what I was telling myself was true and you can just guess how every single scenario played out as I met men over the years. Amidst this evidence, I also received the grandest of blessings in the form of my gorgeous son, not to mention all the personal growth that has happened as a result of my old, limiting belief. These days, I realize that there are plenty of men out there who are equally deserving of a committed, loving relationship as I am and that my trust in the success of my own life's journey will inevitably bring my belief to fruition...alongside some action, of course (see Calling In The One link below).

My own life is not the point but serves as a great example. The point is that you will always strive to prove yourself right when it comes to that which you believe to be true. If you believe that you always hit all the red lights when driving, then you will. Funny thing is, you might hit 4 out of 7 red lights, but you will be focused on those 4 red lights instead of those 3 green ones because of what you maintain in your thoughts. If you believe that the world is out to get you, then it will be. If you believe that all the good men are taken, then you will surely find a way to show that this is in fact true. If you think you are undeserving, then you will be. If you think that you're fat, then you will be. And if you think that the Chipping Cheddar witch is walking around in YOUR neighborhood, seeking to turn all your friends and family into stinky cheese, then she will be!

Thank you to author Katharine Holabird, creator of Angelina Ballerina and to her character Henry for reminding me of the power of thought and the intensity of what can happen when we so vehemently attach to something we believe to be true. 

I - again - have to cite a few different sources that have helped me to start shifting and changing the stories in my head. If you find that your stories are making for a challenging reality, help is available! Might I suggest that you scope out any or all of the following:

1. Kristi's Goal Ninjas programs
2. Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) (which we offer here at Prana Holistic)
3. Flower Essences therapy (which I would be happy to facilitate for you here at Prana Holistic)
4. Kit Furey's work
5. Anything by Byron Katie
6. Calling In The One, by Katherine Woodward Thomas

Thank you for reading.

Roberta Shepherd for Prana Holistic

Doing The Work

I am pursuing yet another of Kristi's Goal Ninjas programs, Get More Sh-t Done. As an accompanying gift to those enrolled in the program, Kristi gave out the book Do The Work, by Steven Pressfield. I am on my second time through this awesome little ditty and am beginning to get more and more of a grasp on what it really means to do what it is that you actually want in life. Seems like it should be so simple - you want to do something that you know makes you happy, you do it, you're happy. End of story. Yeah, not so much. At least not in my world. My story goes more like this: I want to do something that I know makes me happy (let's call it "my goal"), I fantasize about it, I make up stories as to why and how I probably can't achieve my goal, I do some personal work to heal and improve myself, I start taking risks and making some moves towards my goal, I get on a roll, I'm feeling great and getting closer to my goal, I'm doing good so I tell myself that I deserve "a break", I start to slack off on doing the work, I fall completely off the wagon, I wallow in self-defeat, self-deprecation and self-loathing, I struggle for what feels like a long time to get back up, dust myself off and do more personal work to heal and improve myself, and the whole cycle starts all over again.

I am in the midst of repeating this cycle yet again in my life and am at the "struggle for what feels like a long time to get back up and dust myself off" stage, and dealing with some residual self-defeatist and self-deprecating thoughts and behaviors. I can tell that despite my repeating this redundant cycle, I've definitely progressed in the big picture because I have absolutely no desire to feed energy to the completely falling off the wagon and wallowing in my own crap stages. Previously, I would talk about my seeming failures as though they were a pervasive disease - and I suppose they can be if we spend too much time focusing on them. Of course, talking about my falls and the accompanying self-loathing only works to make those things persist. Just last night, I heard myself say: "I'm so sick of hearing myself talk!" - this was with regards to the potential of talking to anyone about what I have recently perceived to be a failure in my life. At this rate, I'd rather just do the work, which is what Pressfield's book is all about.

The stages of my cyclical story from "I'm doing good so I tell myself that I deserve "a break" to "I struggle for what feels like a long time to get back up" are all about resistance. AND, resistance is completely normal! Hurray! I'm "normal"! Pressfield notes that resistance is "most commonly elicited [in response to]...any act that rejects immediate gratification in favor of long-term growth, health, or integrity." So...perfect, right? Anything we seek to do that is "good" and that seeks to improve ourselves will be met with incredible resistance. Sounds daunting. Part of me just wants to hang up my self-improvement kit and call it a day. For good. The other part of me is finally showing a desire to rise to the challenge. At the very least I can know that based on the amount of resistance I'm currently experiencing, I'm on the right track. Pressfield's "Rule of thumb" confirms that I'm on the right track: "The more important a call or action is to our soul's evolution, the more Resistance we will feel toward pursuing it."

Pressfield does a really good job of letting readers know that failure is not only normal, but a good sign. I mindfully wiped my brow when I read the following that absolutely deserves to stand on it's own:

"A crash means we have failed. We gave it everything we had and we came up short. A crash does not mean we are losers. A crash means we have to grow. A crash means we're at the threshold of learning something, which means we're getting better, we're acquiring the wisdom of our craft. A crash compels us to figure out what works and what doesn't work - and to understand the difference."

And the final point? Do the work. And keep doing the work. Keep getting up and brushing yourself off. Keep pursuing personal work to heal and improve yourself. Don't give up.
I've often wished there was a more glamorous final point. Something more along the lines of: pass go, collect $200, sit on the beach with a margarita and your goal will fall at your feet. But oh no, pursuing your unique calling and your personal and lasting happiness is like being 21 and working 3 jobs to save up to go traveling - you never rest. But once you get to Europe, it's all the more wonderful 'cause you did the work to get there! It was hard and long and you were tired, strung out and uncomfortable, but you did it! (Well I did anyways and in deed, Europe was awesome.)

If you'd like support doing your work, I'd certainly suggest investigating any of Kristi's Goal Ninjas programs as well as Steven Pressfield's book, Do The Work. Beyond those resources, there are a wealth of things you can do to heal and support yourself as you move more and more authentically towards the life of your dreams. Give us a call at Prana Holistic today to explore your options.

Roberta Shepherd for Prana Holistic

Gratitude Becomes You!

I was recently blessed to participate in Kristi's Goal Ninjas program for a second time. Our group completed the program a week ago tomorrow and, once again, it was fantastic and revealing. Kristi is an insightful, knowledgeable and skilled facilitator with a brilliant ability to add perspective to all facets of life and living.
On Sunday, after the completion of the program, I had a horrible time and, as a result, felt incredibly guilty that my son may not have been enjoying a day that could have been a lot more upbeat and fun. It was sabotage Sunday - the day after incredible and profound awareness' have been had and start to try and sink in. The insights and processes that had been facilitated for me by Kristi the day before were deep and difficult to embrace. While the purpose of profound awareness is to help create positive change, there seems to be a period of fighting and struggling against what is or what could be and we resist change - this resistance being very inherent and sometimes a real source of struggle for us. I know I am not immune to this struggle and while I don't want to focus on it, I am always doing my best to learn and grow from it.

When my son, Caleb, went down for a nap on that hard day, I contemplated how everything that was causing me stress, unease and anger had absolutely nothing to do with him and how he was so undeserving of the wrath of my mood. I knew that it was up to me to turn things around as it wasn't Caleb that had changed, but ME that's TRYING to change. One of the best things to do to incite change is to take action - something one of my great mentors always reminds us of (wink, Kristi). I sat down at my computer and visited Byron Katie's website, thework.com . There are some absolutely amazing videos on there of Byron Katie facilitating the work for others and her site is a wonderful resource for anyone wanting to make it through their struggles, myself included. I did the work on myself and issues as they related to Caleb and made it through the day with much less negativity.

On Monday night I read a chapter in a stunning book I'm reading right now by Katherine Woodward Thomas called Calling In The One. The chapter was all about gratitude. Woodward Thomas tells about how once, during a really low time in her life, she made a commitment to wake up half an hour earlier than usual every day for 30 days and write 5 pages on all the things in her life she was grateful for. 5 pages! Not 3 things or 5 things or 1 page, but 5 pages! She shares on how challenging it became and how, not long into the process, she had to start digging really deep to fill up those pages. I was really inspired by this and I thought about how, in the arena of positive living, we're often encouraged to keep a gratitude journal or to consider what it is we're grateful for every day, but Woodward Thomas really took it to another level. I decided to follow suit. On Tuesday, I challenged myself to be grateful all day long. Every single thing that I saw or that occurred to me or that I perceived or thought of, I found the reason that I was grateful for it. Even and especially the things that I felt most challenged by. My day, thoughts and my overall feelings and experience were completely memorable! Suddenly, everything around me was lit up and all I could see were good things and all I could reflect upon was how absolutely blessed I am. Challenges and low times became opportunities and anger became a chance for transformation. This experience has instilled in me a belief that when it comes to gratitude, we ought to take it to a new level. One of my great mentors, mentioned previously, says that when we really want to affect change, we have to work on it every day. With gratitude, I think it needs to be absolutely constant. Especially during low times and especially if you're REALLY looking to do something differently to create a new you.

This experiment is very reflective of Byron Katie's work and how she encourages people to turn their miseries around and find what it is they are grateful for in these things. In light of my experiment - which continues by the way - I am now challenging myself to find reasons why I'm grateful for the most upsetting, disruptive and difficult experiences of my life. While I continue to struggle to find reasons for a few things in particular, so far this has been an incredibly life-altering experiment.

If you're looking for ways to move and transform your misery, might I make a few recommendations:

1. The Gratitude Experiment (as described)
2. Kristi's Goal Ninjas program
3. The Work, by Byron Katie
4. Calling In The One, by Katherine Woodward Thomas

All of these pursuits, if done with intent and a genuine desire for change are REAL platforms for just that: positive change. I encourage you to BE the person of your wildest dreams. Today.

I am grateful for having written this blog post because it has helped me to reflect on my own journey towards greater awareness and personal change. Thank you for reading.

Roberta Shepherd for Prana Holistic

Value of a Life

What would you do to save your own life?

Let me answer that question - you would do almost anything. 

You would walk across coals, swim through sharks, lift cars, wrestle alligators, and do all number of other terrifying feats to reach the other side, where you heart still beats and your brain still lives. 

And yet ask someone to do ANYTHING to live the life they actually WANT to live, and you will be met with more resistance than ... um ... well, you will meet a great deal of resistance, the kind for which no metaphor can possibly convey.

Why are we so desperate to save our life if we don't even enjoy LIVING it?

So I ask you - what are you doing today to make your life not just continue, but passionate and LIVED?

Live, damn you, before my head explodes!

Kristi Shmyr

Be your own Hero

I just got back from a retreat in Scottsdale, Arizona. I jumped BIG the last quarter of 2010 and landed in a year-long mastermind/mentorship program, investing MANY thousands of dollars in ME and my big dreams. This retreat was the first of a year of pushing my expectations of myself and the number of people I can serve beyond what is comfortable into the realm of transformational, where I love to be. 

While there, I was discussing my program, Goal Ninjas, in a small mastermind within the larger group. The group began to discuss the name: Goal Ninjas. Because I primarily work with women, it was suggested that I should change the name as 

"women do not identify with being the warrior; they long, instead, to be the princess, and to be rescued".

I was shocked and, to be honest, offended by this idea. Is this really what women deeply, at their essence, want?

I sure hope not.

My whole life I have prided myself on being tough, resilient, motivated, and independent. I am fiercely passionate about creating the life I want. Yes, I have had issues with being rescued by my family, as the "baby", but there is nothing I long for more than to be successful, on my own terms and in my own right and by my own definitions. The thought of waiting for someone to bring me my dreams is foreign to me. I ... well, I just Do Not Compute. 

Women, are you waiting to be rescued, or are you ready to be your own hero?

Does your life depend on whether or not your prince arrives, or are you tackling the dragon all on your own?

I sure hope you are with me on this, ladies (gents too of course). Be your own hero - be the creator of your OWN kick-ass life.

Climb down your own damn hair, Rapunzel.

Kristi Shmyr,

Goal Ninja!

p.s. if you want help, not rescue, in creating the Kick Ass Life you Crave, join me for a free talk on how to do that, either this Thursday, Friday, or next Tuesday. Check out www.goalninjas.com/free-talks for more information.

Becoming A Ninja At Life

I had the complete pleasure of being a participant in Kristi's fall Goal Ninjas program here at Prana, and I say with complete confidence and excitement that it changed my life! Let me tell you how.

First of all, I discovered that I'm not exactly in line with my true passion. In fact, I had even convinced myself that I "don't really identify with the word passion" - what a bunch of bollocks! I certainly DO identify with the word passion, I just hadn't aligned myself with something that makes me feel more passionate than anything else! By Kristi's skilled facilitation and questioning, as well as the processes that are presented through the Goal Ninjas program, I was able to discover where my true passion lies. Now, knowing what really entices passion within me, I can actively pursue that.


Secondly, I've been pursuing ongoing activities to change mental programs that I have that are no longer conducive to my personal success and advancement. These activities are designed to establish new mental programs that are positive and that contribute to my creating the life that I really desire instead of that which I formerly believed I deserved - far less than the best! One of these activities is called evidence journaling and here's how it works: every day for 90-days (new habits, including habitual thinking, should be established by practice over a 90-day period), I am recording evidence to prove the following new beliefs: 1) I am abundant, 2) I am attractive, 3) I am valuable, 4) I am worthwhile, and 5) I am complete (whole, perfect and complete just the way that I am). Amazing things are happening. I am pulling away from undermining thoughts and behaviors and finding all the more evidence to illustrate that leading an enriched and fulfilling life is my divine birth right! Moreover, I am actually beginning to embody the fact that I deserve the absolute best that IS available to me in this universe.

As far as I'm concerned, these are amazing and incredibly impactful paradigm shifts that may not have happened (or at least not as soon) had I not participated in the Goal Ninjas program. I believe that everyone deserves to know that they are worthy of the very best the world has to offer. I also strongly believe that each and every person who thinks otherwise of themselves or who isn't seeming to achieve what they really want or who's just plain unhappy can't afford NOT to pursue the Goal Ninjas program. And...I really don't care if I come across as being biased since Kristi is my friend and colleague - that's how fired up I am about what Goal Ninjas has to offer!

If you want to read more about the concepts of Goal Ninjas, check out my recent column in SEE Magazine: Un-Google Your Mind, or, if you want to know more about the program, check out goalninjas.com. If you'd like to sign up for the program, which I, obviously, highly encourage you to do, please contact Kristi at: kristi@pranaholistic.ca, or give us a call on 780.454.5299.

Happy 2011 everyone! Here's to your becoming a ninja at life!

Roberta Shepherd for Prana Holistic

Jump THEN Learn to Fly

I met a new friend recently who gave such a wonderful example of my goal getting philosophy of "Jump, THEN learn to fly". She went down to South America and found a health product that amazed her. She asked if they had it in North America - they didn't, but wanted a distributor. She offered to be the North American distributor, but they told her she needed to be an importer. She wasn't. Now here's the great part. Most people would have backed off and walked away. Not my new Goal Ninja Friend. She said she was, and then came back and Googled "How to Become an Importer"! She incorporated a name and voila! She was an importer with distributor rights to a product she believed in. 

Now THAT'S how it's done!

Kristi Shmyr
Goal Ninja and owner of Prana Holistic

Is there a success formula?

Learning the secrets and the "rules" of success is a passion of mine. I have spent the past 7 years studying, reading, listening and attending seminars on this topic, and hundreds of thousands of dollars and countless hours later, here are some of the things I have figured out: 1. You need a big "why" for any goal. This is your reason for doing what you do, and this reason has to be big enough to get you out of bed, and keep you working when you "don't feel like it". Without this, you get temporarily motivated, excited and passionate, but it will never last. You will set goals, New Years' Resolutions, and make promises to yourself, but you won't have the will to keep going when that initial burst of conviction wears off. 2. You need to understand your reasons for NOT wanting to achieve. Sounds strange, but our mind does not keep us from success to be mean; there is always a benefit your subconscious mind sees to stay exactly as you are, without your goal. Finding out what that is and resolving it is critical to your success. 3. The best way to tell your future is to create it. I see no reason to leave the content of you future up to chance. If you really want to achieve success, you need a very clear image of how you define that success. What does it look like, feel like, and sound like? Don’t limit yourself, because there are possibilities you could not even imagine from where you currently are, but get an idea. Since energy cannot be created nor destroyed, everything you want already exists; it simply needs to change form. Hold that image long enough and it will be drawn to you as you move towards it. 4. Act. Notice I said it will be drawn to you as you move towards it. I truly believe the universe can only do for you what it can do through you; waiting for your dreams to rain down from the sky will leave you waiting a great deal. Get clear and focused and then take inspired action, huge action, that makes your dreams inevitable. 5. Never stop readjusting and realigning. Success, like life, is never static. It will require you to be dynamic and changeable. Our knowledge doubles every 3 years, so you CANNOT keep doing what you have always done and expect to even stay the same; if you refuse to evolve, you are not only refusing to grow, you are actually DE-volving. Realign your goals and your actions with your purpose constantly. And embrace change; it is, ironically, the only constant. 6. Practice, and then simply let go and trust. Success requires practice. Just as working out for 5 days for 1 minute will not transform your body, inconsistent action and focus on your goals will not transform your life. You need to bring structure and order to any area that you want to be successful in. After that, comes the easiest and yet most difficult task – letting go and trusting that what you desire is already coming. This work is my passion. If you resonate with this Success Formula and want to learn more, I invite you to join Goal Ninjas: 6 Steps to the Kick Ass Life you Crave, starting November 6, 2010. If you want to learn more, check out www.goalninjas.com, or call Kristi at 780.454.5299

Stress: Your Mental Perceptions. So How Can You Cope?

Stress: BLAH! For the most part, not many of us can claim to be non-stressed. Perhaps in a single moment, your perception of the world and yourself does not include an overpowering feeling of stress, but surely, as your day proceeds, you can notice at least some experience of stress. Some people proceed through their days in a constant state of feeling "stressed out". Even "good" things can create an experience of stress that perhaps we consider to be "good" stress. I don't suppose "good" stress is something worth trying to change. Rather, it's our experience of "bad" stress that we all need help coping with. Stress inevitably leads to ill-health that can manifest as minor aches and pains, colds and flu (since stress depletes the immune system), chronic conditions and even degenerative illnesses. It is estimated that 90 per cent of illnesses and disease are related to stress - no kidding!

So where does stress start? Stress is a mental perception, so I do believe that it starts within our mental faculties of being. For example, when Caleb (my son) throws his food on the floor, I perceive stress, which I feel physically and that sometimes gives me a feeling as though I'm going to explode in anger (as embarrassing as that is for me to admit, let's be honest here). Meanwhile, I see how Caleb's dad interacts with him, and he is very laid back and non-reactive while Caleb throws his food around and makes a mess: he simply lets Caleb know that that's not okay, and proceeds with life. In reality, nothing is being altered to the point of negatively affecting my life nor is anyone being hurt when Caleb throws his food on the floor, so why do I perceive stress? Well, my mom keeps a very clean house and has always spent lots of time and energy maintaining that and clearly perceiving stress when it's not that way. Now, before proceeding, let me clarify that I adored my childhood, I love my mother dearly and I know damn well that we, as parents, do the very best that we can with the resources that are available to us in each passing moment. I say all that in order that it doesn't seem that I'm placing blame when I say that surely, that's where my mental perception of: messy house = stress, is coming from.

Now, I realize that changing the mental belief that a messy house is stressful is what is really necessary in order that this not ride me like it does. I mean, Caleb's a toddler and I best be getting used to messes if I want to proceed through his childhood with ease and minimal stress. In the meantime, I need to focus on how I can cope with my perception of stress in response to Caleb's creating messes. There are many ways of coping with stress to the best of your ability. At the end of the day, the fact that stress is a part of daily living is not going to change, it's OUR way of coping, thinking and behaving that is subject to change. I'm going to encourage you to start with deep abdominal breathing. For a more in depth explanation, please check out my most recent column: Take A Deep Breath... for SEE Magazine. For a video on how to do deep abdominal breathing and for more tips and ideas on how to reduce your stress, please check out The Ultimate Stress Seminar: this also offers you the opportunity to sign up for Kristi and I's upcoming FREE teleseminar dedicated to helping you live an easy and stress-free life. Finally, for help with changing your thoughts and beliefs that are keeping you stressed out (ie: messy house = stress), please check out Goal Ninjas: Kristi's passionate pursuit to lead you on a journey towards the life you crave!

What are your most regular perceptions of stress? What are your best ways of coping with perceived stress? Your comments are really important to us, so do us a favour and leave one...or two...or more! We want to hear from you!

Roberta Shepherd for Prana Holistic

My Friend John Asaraf, chilling with me!

Here I am, chilling with my new friend John Asaraf, of The Secret fame, in San Diego.

That's just how I roll!

Kristi Shmyr

Your Ego is Your Amigo!

Most self-help books, programs and experts will tell you that in order to achieve a truly happy life, you need to forgo the evil "ego".

Unless you intend to live your days on a mountain top in the lotus position
DO NOT LISTEN TO THIS GARBAGE!

If you want to live a life integrated into society, ANY society, you need to appreciate and respect your ego and work WITH it, not against it.

Working against it will only force your ego to work against you and sabotage your efforts, something I think we are all familiar with (has your head ever convinced you, mid-diet, that it doesn't matter if you eat a whole bag of cookies? That's your ego sabotaging you!)

So how do you avoid this? You have to respect the ego, and the survival brain, and enroll it in your goal.

We will go into this in much greater detail in our September Goal Ninja Bootcamp, including exercises on enrolling your ego, but in the meantime, here's something to keep in mind:

Get clear on what you fear would happen if you pursue or achieve a goal. Those fears are your ego's way of keeping you safe and are there for your safety and protection. Once you start listening to your fears with respect and acknowledging the important role they play in your life, you will have a better chance of your ego allowing you to proceed with your dreams.

If you are interested in achieving your goals and dreams, please go to www.goalninjas.com for more information on our upcoming Goal Ninjas Bootcamp.

Kristi Shmyr
Prana Holistic