Gratitude Becomes You!

I was recently blessed to participate in Kristi's Goal Ninjas program for a second time. Our group completed the program a week ago tomorrow and, once again, it was fantastic and revealing. Kristi is an insightful, knowledgeable and skilled facilitator with a brilliant ability to add perspective to all facets of life and living.
On Sunday, after the completion of the program, I had a horrible time and, as a result, felt incredibly guilty that my son may not have been enjoying a day that could have been a lot more upbeat and fun. It was sabotage Sunday - the day after incredible and profound awareness' have been had and start to try and sink in. The insights and processes that had been facilitated for me by Kristi the day before were deep and difficult to embrace. While the purpose of profound awareness is to help create positive change, there seems to be a period of fighting and struggling against what is or what could be and we resist change - this resistance being very inherent and sometimes a real source of struggle for us. I know I am not immune to this struggle and while I don't want to focus on it, I am always doing my best to learn and grow from it.

When my son, Caleb, went down for a nap on that hard day, I contemplated how everything that was causing me stress, unease and anger had absolutely nothing to do with him and how he was so undeserving of the wrath of my mood. I knew that it was up to me to turn things around as it wasn't Caleb that had changed, but ME that's TRYING to change. One of the best things to do to incite change is to take action - something one of my great mentors always reminds us of (wink, Kristi). I sat down at my computer and visited Byron Katie's website, thework.com . There are some absolutely amazing videos on there of Byron Katie facilitating the work for others and her site is a wonderful resource for anyone wanting to make it through their struggles, myself included. I did the work on myself and issues as they related to Caleb and made it through the day with much less negativity.

On Monday night I read a chapter in a stunning book I'm reading right now by Katherine Woodward Thomas called Calling In The One. The chapter was all about gratitude. Woodward Thomas tells about how once, during a really low time in her life, she made a commitment to wake up half an hour earlier than usual every day for 30 days and write 5 pages on all the things in her life she was grateful for. 5 pages! Not 3 things or 5 things or 1 page, but 5 pages! She shares on how challenging it became and how, not long into the process, she had to start digging really deep to fill up those pages. I was really inspired by this and I thought about how, in the arena of positive living, we're often encouraged to keep a gratitude journal or to consider what it is we're grateful for every day, but Woodward Thomas really took it to another level. I decided to follow suit. On Tuesday, I challenged myself to be grateful all day long. Every single thing that I saw or that occurred to me or that I perceived or thought of, I found the reason that I was grateful for it. Even and especially the things that I felt most challenged by. My day, thoughts and my overall feelings and experience were completely memorable! Suddenly, everything around me was lit up and all I could see were good things and all I could reflect upon was how absolutely blessed I am. Challenges and low times became opportunities and anger became a chance for transformation. This experience has instilled in me a belief that when it comes to gratitude, we ought to take it to a new level. One of my great mentors, mentioned previously, says that when we really want to affect change, we have to work on it every day. With gratitude, I think it needs to be absolutely constant. Especially during low times and especially if you're REALLY looking to do something differently to create a new you.

This experiment is very reflective of Byron Katie's work and how she encourages people to turn their miseries around and find what it is they are grateful for in these things. In light of my experiment - which continues by the way - I am now challenging myself to find reasons why I'm grateful for the most upsetting, disruptive and difficult experiences of my life. While I continue to struggle to find reasons for a few things in particular, so far this has been an incredibly life-altering experiment.

If you're looking for ways to move and transform your misery, might I make a few recommendations:

1. The Gratitude Experiment (as described)
2. Kristi's Goal Ninjas program
3. The Work, by Byron Katie
4. Calling In The One, by Katherine Woodward Thomas

All of these pursuits, if done with intent and a genuine desire for change are REAL platforms for just that: positive change. I encourage you to BE the person of your wildest dreams. Today.

I am grateful for having written this blog post because it has helped me to reflect on my own journey towards greater awareness and personal change. Thank you for reading.

Roberta Shepherd for Prana Holistic